Chelsea
Ever since they became relevant in 2006, they’ve always been a soulless outfit. One built on a wealthy man’s desire to legalise and clean money that he may not have earned in ways that global authorities would approve of.
But lately, they’ve really hit a daft low. Being predominantly carried by the one world-class talent they have….. and he’s showing all the ankle/love/eyelash fluttery/sluttery he can to Real Madrid in a bid to get his desired move to Spain.
Add to this the fact that the atmosphere there is flat enough to iron on and it’s all quite odd. They’ve a new boss who has made a fine start with a side playing decent football, but to when I look at the atmosphere there in these decent days of being a Chelsea fan, well I’ve seen more life in a tramps vest!
Romelu Lukaku
I mentioned last week that I wasn’t overly concerned by his Juventus comments. I’m still not concerned by them. What I’m more concerned by is the fact that he’s the size of a pine wardrobe and about half as mobile as one.
His first touch, well, it’s the only thing I’ve seen that’s as brutally poor as the justice handed out to Steven Avery!
Part of me has some sympathy for him. While he’s clearly living off bountiful food supplies off the pitch, he’s barely getting by on scraps on it for United at the minute.
I hope he uses Sunday to make a start on turning things round, but I’m goth level optimistic we’ll see him do this unfortunately.
Arsenal
As I watched Leicester bombard and dominate them early on, on Monday night, I sniggered into my hoody sleeve that their recent upturn in form would be brought to a beautiful end. I could once again look forward to finding Arsenal Fan TV hilarious viewing…
No. Those emotional chips were roundly pissed on by an attacking display that was truly breathtaking at times. I’m not someone that wants to go rushing to give praise to a side that I’ve taken great joy in the recent mediocrity of, but they’ve really got themselves together after a very clumsy looking start to life under their new boss.
Jose Mourinho
I’m a fan. I love what a relentless shithouse he is. I love that no matter what the situation, he can so eloquently add fuel to the fire and mix things up beautifully and just watch the flames spread as he sets alight those who question his standing or capability to do the job…
What I’m not enjoying is the Scouse type way that he appears to be banging on about what he’s won in the past. Completely overlooking the fact that his current performance level means he’s very unlikely to add to his honours list any time soon… just banging on about his past like that means you’re not allowed to question the present and near future.
*
I sometimes say funny words in venues that allow me access to a mic and a stool, have a look if you liked what you read 👍🏻
